Last week during our session with Taylor's special needs teacher she told me to start using happy and sad faces to try and lessen the whining and to try and make him follow rules better. Example...Taylor is fighting with me about wearing a light sweater cause its to warm for a winter coat. I say "Taylor you are making mommy mad, don't you want her to be happy?" he says yes but continues to throw a fit about wanting his winter coat. Ok I give up, pick my battles. Tried the happy/sad thing all week, it always ended up with him whining. At his meeting today they gave me a book with a 2 page section on whining, and seriously I have done everything those 2 pages said. If it wasn't so annoying and a social issue I would just give up!
There was that then, there is my oldest. He decided mid week that he was going to flip out and tell me he needs his own space and he just can't take it anymore! I can't give him his own space. I tried once, built a fake little wall in their room and he ruined it for himself. So i am not willing to try that again. But in a way i feel for the kid, he is 7 and the other two never ever leave him alone. Then again I don't know whats become of him. He gets bored after 15 minutes of his DS. Then he wonders around the house looking for something to do and irritating me. I give him ideas and he just whines and says "noo I'm just so bored." Well no shit kid find something to do!!! Not only is this happening at home but at school too!!! No, this can't happen!! He was always so smart at school and loved it. I don't understand.
So does a pregnancy really change kids this much. I expected once the baby was here things would be tough, But not right now.
To top this all of my use to be sweet husband has became just a big pain in the ass. But that's ok, apparently I can handle the stress, not like I really have a choice!
Friday, February 24, 2012
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
A little more history, along with where we are now.
Taylor is my add/autistic child. They ruled out ADHD this year, saying he isn't hyper, he just can't seem to focus on one thing at a time, or really pay attention to much. Which is really odd cause he is so so smart. He is almost smarter then my 7 yo. It really confuses even his teachers. But they are sticking with their recent diagnoses. We have yet to actually get a drs opinion. I have a feeling that's coming, cause at his last meeting I was explaining his non stop whining and they said maybe its time we get a dr involved. They don't understand the whining anymore then I do. We have been a very strict schedule for some time now. I regulate game playing time. So really all the boys, shouldn't have to argue with me. But they do. However...Taylor doesn't argue, he cries. Let me give a preview...
Me. "Taylor its time its time to turn off the Wii.
Taylor. whinny voice.."Awww I wanna play the Wii."
Me. "No Taylor, its been an hour, its time to turn it off and have some lunch."
Taylor. stilling whining "I wanna play the Wii. I wanna play the Wii, I wanna play the Wii." while walking to the table.
Me."What would you like for lunch?" trying to change the subject.
Taylor. "I wanna play the Wii."... and so on. for about 15 minutes. I end up just giving him what he gets every day for lunch then this happens, right after lunch.
Me. "shower time, go get in the shower.
Taylor. "AWWW I WANNA PLAY THE Wii."
Me. "I'm gonna throw the effin Wii out the damn window!" (yes mommy has a potty mouth)
Taylor. even louder "Aww I wanna play the Wii."
Me. "OMG TAYLOR, get in the shower, get ready for school." So he cries for a few minutes in the shower. and then we are over it, after the shower i let him watch tv for about 15-30 minutes before leaving for school. And you can only guess what happens there right...Only its not the wii its "i wanna watch tv."
So that was last week, and many, many weeks before. Some days where better then others and some days where worse. I thought last week was the worse it has been in a very long time. Well let tell you about this week. My 4yo, whose name is Brodie. Has decided that he really wants to become my most defiant child and disagree to everything I ask of him. This is so unusual he use to be so good and so easy...ha not anymore. The boys have had me in tears all week. Along with Brodie there is Taylor, and like I said, I thought last week was bad...This week...Taylor has decided that he needs to put his shoes on the wrong feet then yell at me when i tell him they are wrong..He literally believes they are right, and they are not. After arguing i just fix them, which results in his kicking me. Also, along with his normal crying routine he has set, he has thrown in a whole new set of reasons to cry. Like he was playing with a toy and then stopped so his brother started playing with it, and he is just not okay with that, He decides he needs to scream and cry even more then before. He cries when I ask him why he is crying. He cries when I ask him to pick something up, or to go to bed. He cries all the time! Its only wenesday and I can not count the number of fits the 2 of them have had. But I can count the number of times I have cried and asked myself what the hell am I doing wrong?!?! that number is 5. I have no answers...but I try to stay positive, and I remember those moments he runs to me hugging me telling me "I'm the best mom in the world." Those moments are priceless and why I love being a mom!
Me. "Taylor its time its time to turn off the Wii.
Taylor. whinny voice.."Awww I wanna play the Wii."
Me. "No Taylor, its been an hour, its time to turn it off and have some lunch."
Taylor. stilling whining "I wanna play the Wii. I wanna play the Wii, I wanna play the Wii." while walking to the table.
Me."What would you like for lunch?" trying to change the subject.
Taylor. "I wanna play the Wii."... and so on. for about 15 minutes. I end up just giving him what he gets every day for lunch then this happens, right after lunch.
Me. "shower time, go get in the shower.
Taylor. "AWWW I WANNA PLAY THE Wii."
Me. "I'm gonna throw the effin Wii out the damn window!" (yes mommy has a potty mouth)
Taylor. even louder "Aww I wanna play the Wii."
Me. "OMG TAYLOR, get in the shower, get ready for school." So he cries for a few minutes in the shower. and then we are over it, after the shower i let him watch tv for about 15-30 minutes before leaving for school. And you can only guess what happens there right...Only its not the wii its "i wanna watch tv."
So that was last week, and many, many weeks before. Some days where better then others and some days where worse. I thought last week was the worse it has been in a very long time. Well let tell you about this week. My 4yo, whose name is Brodie. Has decided that he really wants to become my most defiant child and disagree to everything I ask of him. This is so unusual he use to be so good and so easy...ha not anymore. The boys have had me in tears all week. Along with Brodie there is Taylor, and like I said, I thought last week was bad...This week...Taylor has decided that he needs to put his shoes on the wrong feet then yell at me when i tell him they are wrong..He literally believes they are right, and they are not. After arguing i just fix them, which results in his kicking me. Also, along with his normal crying routine he has set, he has thrown in a whole new set of reasons to cry. Like he was playing with a toy and then stopped so his brother started playing with it, and he is just not okay with that, He decides he needs to scream and cry even more then before. He cries when I ask him why he is crying. He cries when I ask him to pick something up, or to go to bed. He cries all the time! Its only wenesday and I can not count the number of fits the 2 of them have had. But I can count the number of times I have cried and asked myself what the hell am I doing wrong?!?! that number is 5. I have no answers...but I try to stay positive, and I remember those moments he runs to me hugging me telling me "I'm the best mom in the world." Those moments are priceless and why I love being a mom!
Who I am.
I am a wife and mother in a house full of boys! A lot of people know my name but not my story. They know what they have heard, but they have no idea what I've been through.
So let me explain. I had my 1st child at 19 and no clue what I was doing and had a lot of help from my parents. I wasn't the smartest and made a lot of bad decisions. Including dating a physio-path for about 3 years. Whom donated his awesome sperm to me, making my 2nd boy. Along with that child came 6 months of weekly counseling to help me get through all the hell he put me through. Ladies if you are reading this...Domestic Violence is serious and should never ever be taken lightly...Just saying. Counseling was the best thing that ever happened to me. I really learned a lot and figured out who I wanted to be. Which wasn't just a single mom that guys could take advantage of. I learned how to be a better mother, and to take responsibility for my actions. I learned about men and the types to avoid. I chose to really watch who I dated after this and went for a simple, easy, and quiet boring one. That only lasted about 3 months. He decided having children was just too hard and then drove to California to pick up his ex. Which was just fine with me! After him, I was like ok maybe its just not time to date right now. Well shortly after I heard there was this guy who had a crush on me. I thought I knew a lot about this guy cause he dated my ex best friend, and I was way curious about him. I wanted to know if everything she said about him was true...and I'm just going to make a really long story here, short. He was nothing like she said. He was not doing drugs. He did not beat his child. He did not ever show signs of being abusive. He was the complete opposite of every thing she said. Today I call this man, Hubby.
And then there's the history with his ex, and my ex bestie. She on the other hand is a drug addict. And made our lifes a living hell for the first 6 months of our relationship. When their son was only 2 and half she decided smoking meth was better then watching him, and he was attacked by a dog. He looked like he was beat, but according to the police report, it was a small dog. This all lead up to hubby getting custody and a year later me adopting their son.
About my new son...(their son). I noticed he had some issues that my kids never had. He couldn't talk very well. He was just very...different. So I took him to be evaluated by the school district. They told me they suspected autism and adhd. His dad doesn't like to agree with any of this, and doesn't like to talk about it...
And this is why I am starting a blog/journal. My special needs child is now 5 and we have been on such a roller coaster ride, I just thought it would be nice to have a place where I can talk about my daily or weekly struggles. I have 3 boys. 4, 5, and 7. And for the 1st time in my life I am pregnant, and it was planned, and its with a person I love and adore. I am 17 weeks along, and its also a boy. I'm telling ya, a house full of boys. I hope if there are any other parents out there struggling that this will be a helpful place where we can laugh at our struggles and get through them together.
So let me explain. I had my 1st child at 19 and no clue what I was doing and had a lot of help from my parents. I wasn't the smartest and made a lot of bad decisions. Including dating a physio-path for about 3 years. Whom donated his awesome sperm to me, making my 2nd boy. Along with that child came 6 months of weekly counseling to help me get through all the hell he put me through. Ladies if you are reading this...Domestic Violence is serious and should never ever be taken lightly...Just saying. Counseling was the best thing that ever happened to me. I really learned a lot and figured out who I wanted to be. Which wasn't just a single mom that guys could take advantage of. I learned how to be a better mother, and to take responsibility for my actions. I learned about men and the types to avoid. I chose to really watch who I dated after this and went for a simple, easy, and quiet boring one. That only lasted about 3 months. He decided having children was just too hard and then drove to California to pick up his ex. Which was just fine with me! After him, I was like ok maybe its just not time to date right now. Well shortly after I heard there was this guy who had a crush on me. I thought I knew a lot about this guy cause he dated my ex best friend, and I was way curious about him. I wanted to know if everything she said about him was true...and I'm just going to make a really long story here, short. He was nothing like she said. He was not doing drugs. He did not beat his child. He did not ever show signs of being abusive. He was the complete opposite of every thing she said. Today I call this man, Hubby.
And then there's the history with his ex, and my ex bestie. She on the other hand is a drug addict. And made our lifes a living hell for the first 6 months of our relationship. When their son was only 2 and half she decided smoking meth was better then watching him, and he was attacked by a dog. He looked like he was beat, but according to the police report, it was a small dog. This all lead up to hubby getting custody and a year later me adopting their son.
About my new son...(their son). I noticed he had some issues that my kids never had. He couldn't talk very well. He was just very...different. So I took him to be evaluated by the school district. They told me they suspected autism and adhd. His dad doesn't like to agree with any of this, and doesn't like to talk about it...
And this is why I am starting a blog/journal. My special needs child is now 5 and we have been on such a roller coaster ride, I just thought it would be nice to have a place where I can talk about my daily or weekly struggles. I have 3 boys. 4, 5, and 7. And for the 1st time in my life I am pregnant, and it was planned, and its with a person I love and adore. I am 17 weeks along, and its also a boy. I'm telling ya, a house full of boys. I hope if there are any other parents out there struggling that this will be a helpful place where we can laugh at our struggles and get through them together.
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